"I look around myself wildly, my heart bursting with grief and fear and joy. I am leaving, but I will take this place and its stories with me wherever I go"- Jennifer Donnelly
To be honest, this is going to be a difficult blog to compose. I'm in an unusual state of mind because my emotions are still running rampant through my body, pinging from my heart to my brain like a pin-ball machine racking up a new high-score of uncontrollable emotional memories.
Less than 48 hours ago, my European adventures came to an end faster than I could have ever foreseen. I was told that your time abroad goes by exponentially faster than time at home, but much like a stubborn child, I've never been one to believe in the nay-sayers (Santa is real). But, it breaks my heart to accept that the nay-sayers were absolutely right in this case: time whizzed by, faster than Usain Bolt chasing a cheetah.
As I sit in my bed (my glorious, heavenly, non-hostle bed), I'm already struggling to accept that I am actually home. I find myself constantly staring at the ceiling, contemplating the parallels between reality and fantasy, blurring the lines between the two because there's just no way 4.5 months went by that fast, and it has to be impossible that I am on American soil already. It just can't be true that these last few months have slipped from tangible to elusive so quickly, leaving me with nothing but my memories. But alas, all good things eventually have to come to an end (whether or not you like it).
Its hard to leave a place you so quickly fell in love with, but I am lucky to have fallen in love with such an amazing experience, people, and places. There were so many times where I found myself awe-struck, standing breathless overlooking the coast of Ireland, pinching myself right then and there that my reality was someone else's dream, reminding myself that wherever I was, was once nothing but a long lost fantasy I had whilst daydreaming about traveling the world. It's incredible, really, to experience things you had never considered feasible, or to see things your wildest dreams would envy. It's surreal to explain to people where these last few months have taken me, because honestly, it all sounds like such a lustrous lie way too unbelievable to even be considered true.
It's crazy to sit here and recall all the memories and stories I've collected, sifting through the appropriate ones to share and laugh at all the ones I'll keep close to my heart (and definitely off the internet). I have traveled what seemed like the world, and left a little piece of my heart and each new city I visited- all the while, knowing that no matter where my life may take me, there will always be a piece of me permanently stationed in Iowa City, the home I had never been away from for more than 10 days until I picked up my life and moved 4000 miles away (bold move).
You don't really begin to know yourself until you leave your comfort zone- and Iowa City had and always will be, my comfort zone. Leaving my little sanctuary of Brueggers, Donnelley's, and all the other safety nets of home, left me to realize that there was so much of the world I have yet to see. In such a small amount of time, I was able to grow as a person, taking inventory of all the things that make me, me (for better, and worse). I learned that I get anxious on a plane with every little bump, and that I am not only an outfit repeater, but a story repeater as well. I learned that I don't navigate crowds well, but I can navigate a foreign city (usually). I came to realize that patience is a virtue you have to practice, and it doesn't always come as easily as I'd like it to. I learned to admit fault, defeat, and most importantly I learned to accept the things I could not change, and pick my battles because not everything requires a response. I guess it takes 4000 miles to make you realize that our faults remind us that we're only human, entitled to a few flaws every now and then. The one mistake I didn't make along the way though, was forcing myself out of my comfort zone. Studying abroad was something that terrified me, yet exhilarated me- and I am so thankful my exhilaration beat out my fears, because this experience has been nothing but a dream come true.
Thank you to my mom and dad, for truly giving me the world. You turned my childhood ambitions into a reality for me and I'm not sure if I'll ever be able to accurately express my gratitude or admiration I have for the both of you; I'm so humbled by your love and support (omg i'm crying right now), and wouldn't be where I am today without your encouragement.
So, a cheers to parents, friends, bartenders, and foreign countries for one hell of an adventure. See you soon Ireland, I won't be away for long.
Stay adventurous my friends, and never stop exploring.
To be honest, this is going to be a difficult blog to compose. I'm in an unusual state of mind because my emotions are still running rampant through my body, pinging from my heart to my brain like a pin-ball machine racking up a new high-score of uncontrollable emotional memories.
Less than 48 hours ago, my European adventures came to an end faster than I could have ever foreseen. I was told that your time abroad goes by exponentially faster than time at home, but much like a stubborn child, I've never been one to believe in the nay-sayers (Santa is real). But, it breaks my heart to accept that the nay-sayers were absolutely right in this case: time whizzed by, faster than Usain Bolt chasing a cheetah.
As I sit in my bed (my glorious, heavenly, non-hostle bed), I'm already struggling to accept that I am actually home. I find myself constantly staring at the ceiling, contemplating the parallels between reality and fantasy, blurring the lines between the two because there's just no way 4.5 months went by that fast, and it has to be impossible that I am on American soil already. It just can't be true that these last few months have slipped from tangible to elusive so quickly, leaving me with nothing but my memories. But alas, all good things eventually have to come to an end (whether or not you like it).
Its hard to leave a place you so quickly fell in love with, but I am lucky to have fallen in love with such an amazing experience, people, and places. There were so many times where I found myself awe-struck, standing breathless overlooking the coast of Ireland, pinching myself right then and there that my reality was someone else's dream, reminding myself that wherever I was, was once nothing but a long lost fantasy I had whilst daydreaming about traveling the world. It's incredible, really, to experience things you had never considered feasible, or to see things your wildest dreams would envy. It's surreal to explain to people where these last few months have taken me, because honestly, it all sounds like such a lustrous lie way too unbelievable to even be considered true.
It's crazy to sit here and recall all the memories and stories I've collected, sifting through the appropriate ones to share and laugh at all the ones I'll keep close to my heart (and definitely off the internet). I have traveled what seemed like the world, and left a little piece of my heart and each new city I visited- all the while, knowing that no matter where my life may take me, there will always be a piece of me permanently stationed in Iowa City, the home I had never been away from for more than 10 days until I picked up my life and moved 4000 miles away (bold move).
You don't really begin to know yourself until you leave your comfort zone- and Iowa City had and always will be, my comfort zone. Leaving my little sanctuary of Brueggers, Donnelley's, and all the other safety nets of home, left me to realize that there was so much of the world I have yet to see. In such a small amount of time, I was able to grow as a person, taking inventory of all the things that make me, me (for better, and worse). I learned that I get anxious on a plane with every little bump, and that I am not only an outfit repeater, but a story repeater as well. I learned that I don't navigate crowds well, but I can navigate a foreign city (usually). I came to realize that patience is a virtue you have to practice, and it doesn't always come as easily as I'd like it to. I learned to admit fault, defeat, and most importantly I learned to accept the things I could not change, and pick my battles because not everything requires a response. I guess it takes 4000 miles to make you realize that our faults remind us that we're only human, entitled to a few flaws every now and then. The one mistake I didn't make along the way though, was forcing myself out of my comfort zone. Studying abroad was something that terrified me, yet exhilarated me- and I am so thankful my exhilaration beat out my fears, because this experience has been nothing but a dream come true.
Thank you to my mom and dad, for truly giving me the world. You turned my childhood ambitions into a reality for me and I'm not sure if I'll ever be able to accurately express my gratitude or admiration I have for the both of you; I'm so humbled by your love and support (omg i'm crying right now), and wouldn't be where I am today without your encouragement.
So, a cheers to parents, friends, bartenders, and foreign countries for one hell of an adventure. See you soon Ireland, I won't be away for long.
Stay adventurous my friends, and never stop exploring.
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