Manfull's Handfull

We live in a world so dependent on the perception of those around us. We depend so heavily on the opinions of strangers, and strive for the heights of social acceptance. We are supposed to fit into these perfect square boxes that society has built for us- because fluidity and taboo terrify us. As a society we want to be able to look at someone and know their sexuality, their race, their class, their...life. But that simply isn't reality. Anyone can wear a mask or morph into who they're supposed to be that day- it takes a person who isn't afraid to break the status quo to change the status quo. We live in a world where being your true, authentic, flawed-filled self is usually frowned upon. Instead, we're encourage by society to present a perfect, photo-shopped version of who you really are. You're not supposed to be sad, or fat, or angry- you're supposed to be a happy, physically fit, and emotionally stable. Again, this simply isn't reality. Today- Sean ...

I started 13 Reasons why at the same time most everyone else started watching it- as soon as it was released on Netflix. But unlike most people, I just finished the final episode last night, over a month since its release. It's not that the show wasn't moving, enthralling, or heart-wrenching, because it was all that and more. I couldn't watch it all at once because it made me feel things I had so deeply shoved so far out of sight, I wasn't sure I could watch it all unfold in front of me again. I've never been in a state of mind where I contemplated not living any more- but I can say, as a woman, I have felt (on some level) the pain, embarrassment, and harassment as Hannah Baker. I vividly remember being objectified by boys in the high school hallway (hell- it still happens by random men on the street). I got comments on my body, unsolicited as I was walking to class. I got touched, and grabbed, and put in situations I still get uncomfortable thinking about tod...

I try (really, I do) to wake up happy, positive, and ready to kickass. However, this morning try as I might, I crawled out of bed already angry at the world. More specifically, angry at the guy in the parking lot who felt the need to "warm up" his diesel powered truck at 5:00am. First of all it's April- there is no need to warm up your truck. Second of all, the sun is not even up yet- so likely, neither are most of your neighbors. I asked the North Liberty police if this was illegal. Still waiting for a response. Then, as I'm taking my dog for our morning stroll- I wasn't anticipating, or prepared for, the cold gusts of wind, or that my beloved Podcast ( MyFavoriteMurder ) would stop working *turns out there was just a really long pause and I was just too angry to wait*. Needless to say- I was not happy, positive, or ready to kickass. I got back from my walk and realized that being angry is no way to start the day. So, I had to turn it around. I looked at my ...

You know what absolutely sucks? Being a young adult, forced into the real world where you no longer have the luxury of jumping on a plane to a warm destination for a week of nothing but boozing and beaching with your best friends; It sucks because 1. now you can't even remotely afford it financially and 2. Because you can't even remotely afford it work-wise. Life's a real toe-stubber sometimes, I tell ya. As much fun as I had scrolling through social media, living vicariously through all my friends still lucky enough to partake in spring break antics, I can assure you it would have been a little more enjoyable had I been on the other end of the screen. Alas- the 9-5 wins again. I spent a lot of time scrolling and wishing last week. Wishing I was splashing in an ocean. Wishing I had a cool drink in my hand. Wishing for warm weather- but worst of all I found myself "wishing" for the bodies I saw in the photos. I would stare in awe at these tiny little b...

There's no denying, or avoiding, the hostility within this great nation lately. There are divisions of opinions that have turned neighbors into enemies, and complete groups of people against one another. Maybe it makes me naïve, or stupid, but I genuinely think that if we all (collectively) start to find the positives  our lives will improve dramatically. I constantly see people all over social media actively pointing out the negative news headlines, flooding my timelines with sad images, thoughts, or facts. Please don't think I don't know that our nation, world, and future is/are unstable. I know that, I understand it, and I hate it. However, instead of fermenting the ideas and the negativity, I am going to chose happiness. I found that the more I dwelled on the toxic news, the worse my view on life became. I also see people out there fighting everyday, whether it's protesting, promoting, or informing- they're making the world better because they're figh...

Like most people in the world I greeted the New Year with a few "resolutions". I use the term resolutions very lightly because I never actually wrote them down, or verbalized them because I have a tendency to forgo the whole idea in a matter of weeks and I loathe admitting defeat...but, in an effort to at least say I tried to follow through, here I am. I often get so caught up in life that I put my passions and hobbies on the back burner. As birthday girl Betty White said, " I think everybody needs a passion. Whether it's one passion or a hundred, that's what keeps life interesting ". And if Betty White said it, you can be darn sure I'll abide by it. Which leads me back to the main point ("resolution", if you must), finding time for my passions. I love to write, and as hard as I try to blog on a regular basis, I let life get in the way. But why should I be putting the things that make me the happiest aside? Seems a little counter productive if ...